Editor’s Note: Happy Sunday. This will be my last blog post until we get the new website up (IAmSophiaNelson.com). I also will finish up “The Woman Code: 20 Powerful Keys to Unlock Your Life (Revell),” this coming week. It will be in stores by mid October 2014. Am going to take a much needed vacation. Then come back and resume my duties as a writer, journalist, corporate leadership trainer, and TV personality. 2014 is going to be a really good year, despite a very challenging start!
Today, I want to challenge you to find the courage to start living the life you were meant to live. No more excuses, no more hiding. It is time to get out of the box, cut it to pieces, throw it away, and create the life of your dreams. NOW, before you say “oh Sophia that is easy for someone like you to say. Look at where you are.” Let me tell you something, you don’t know where I am, or what is going on for real in my life. But, I can tell you THIS: I worked hard for everything I got. Against terrible odds, haters, mean people, betrayals, lack of support from some family, some friends. But I got here, and I am still re-inventing, re-creating my life everyday. I wake up everyday thinking of what my NEXT is. I am never going to be stuck in the here and NOW. Life is all about shifting, transforming, shedding, and redefining our lives.
I know some of you women and men feel like this: Well I am too old. There is nothing left for me. I will just do what I have always done. Hang out with who I always hung with. I will live a status quo, comfortable (but really uncomfortable life) and I will just live and someday die. HUH??? Say What?? NO. That is not who you are called to be. We all have gifts. But gifts do not just manifest without us being willing to do the work and thrive. Gifts take time to develop, they take mentorship, setbacks, hardships and cultivating. You will never reach your next level in life, if you remain stuck in what you have always done.
I believe God puts people in our lives who help us to SHIFT, and places us in theirs to do the same. I can think of two women I met socially in the past few years, both of who are enormously smart, talented, and gifted. BUT, they will NEVER get to their next level because they are stuck in “this is how I do it”, “it’s my way or the highway”, they thrive on control, and keeping their box tightly sealed. They don’t like hard work. They have become lazy. (You know I keep it 100%). This is very common. They are middle-aged beyond 50 and stuck. And that is sad because they can be so much more, if only they would get rid of that awful box labeled: BEWARE: This is my life–this is all there is–it’s safe in here.
I did some shedding recently of some people who simply do not belong in the front row of my life. This is very important that you hang around, talk to, and run with people who share your life Code (values), and who are headed where you are headed. DO NOT MISS THIS! You do not have time for slow people, controlling, walled off, boxed in, rigid, inflexible, volatile (one minute they are on your team, the next they are off), small minded, envious, unreliable, emotionally challenged, toxic, distracting people. You just do not. These people will drain you with constant drama and emotional upheaval that serves only to keep you off your life course.
It does NOT mean that these people are bad people. They are not. They just aren’t going where you are going. They don’t share your super-powers of speed, vision, intellect, power, access, networks, creativity, love of people, love of life and most of all your ability to color outside of the lines of life, and stand on boxes, versus living in them. They also have not been where you have been, had to sacrifice what you have sacrificed. It is lonely, and hard to be a person who colors outside of the lines, and who shreds boxes, labels, and limitations.
Eagles fly with Eagles. So why do you continue to hang out with Chickens, Buzzards, and Pigeons??? Those are all fine birds, but none of them can do what the Eagle can do. None of them! The Eagle soars above because he is a superior bird. And he only flocks with others Eagles. You want to change your life? Start hanging with people who get you, who like you, who will not abandon you, who can deal with you, who can TALK to you, HELP you, LIFT you and most of all be LOYAL to you. And understand that YOU must be all of those things in RETURN. Trust me I learned this very recently. I cannot bring everybody along with me. I cannot make a chicken an Eagle. It just won’t work!
My word for the day is: GET OUT OF THE BOX. And please, get out of your own way! You are blocking your destiny. You need to be with people who will push you higher. Yes, they will challenge you. Check you. Rebuke you. Hold you close. Even make you crazy at times, but they will always be pushing you to LIVE higher to your purpose. It’s time to get out of the BOX! Come on, you CAN do this!!!
Have a great day. A great week! A great start to SPRING 2014!!
Sophia A. Nelson, Esquire